After having fugly skin for the better part of the last 12 months, I decided I needed to stop with cake face, and find a lighter make up. Well I went to the shops and found said lighter make up. Eureka! But alas this post is not about the makeup. That will come, when the moon is at its highest.
So said lighter makeup was liquid. It’s hard to colour match for my skin in particular as companies believe only 5 shades of human exist. That is not true! Are you listening to me makeup companies *climbs onto terrace of castle on Isle of Mann and shakes fist*.
Anyway after years of not being the right shade, and no we’re not talking about 50 shades, I found something which doesn’t make me look like The Walking Dead, something which is bright. But is the world perfect? No! Am I? Clearly not.
So I find the right shade, but the concealer is a tad light. The lovely woman at the MAC counter made it look all nice and effortless in putting it on, so I’m like cool I’ll just wake up before I need to go work and wa-lah, my face will be done.
But no, does that happen? Did someone tell me how long it takes liquid makeup to get onto your face? It takes eons!
The makeup I used to cake on was a stick and before that, pressed powder. In two seconds I was out the door, well maybe make that 240 seconds. But you get the picture.
So these days while ya’ll are sleeping, I’m awake at the crack of dawn trying to slap on this liquid makeup with a sponge, trying to make it look au natural while still covering thy shame.
As of yet, it’s still taking me about 900 seconds, give about 300. Note I didn’t say take. No taking.
Anyway, I did slip, slop, slap on the makeup and managed to stumble into work at 7.40am. But I still think I looked patchy! Why is nothing ever easy! Where art thou face?
Anyone else have these beginner issues? No, just me? Any pointers to help me would be kindly received.
Either way my struggle continues! Maybe I’ll be able to master the sponge one day, until then arrivederci, bon voyage, namaste.
– superstitiously yours